January Miscellany

I was going to complain bitterly about the weather, the seemingly incessant rain more specifically. How the pots in our garden couldn’t cope with the deluge. The soaked coats and hair and the cold, don’t talk to me about the cold. Today though, I was greeted with a magnificent sunrise (no good pictures though) and my mood changed. I was going to spend the time complaining, but maybe it’s better to focus on the good things.

It’s been a busy but generally good couple of weeks since I last blogged. In no particular order;

:: Smallest girl turned three and was super excited to be a big girl and to have snow on her birthday. We all went outside and built a snowman in the meager snow. Then came a little party with all the grandparents and a cake. She was very happy to blow out her own candles too. And also the next day on her cake at nursery!!

:: I bought the first bunch of daffodils of 2016. A bit of Cornish sunshine made me think of Leanne and they brightened the kitchen up no end.

:: I splashed out on a new moisturiser as the cold had been playing havoc with my skin. My skin is very, very dry anyway and with the weather, drier still! Somehow a cleanser fell into the bag too. It was only a small size to see if it agreed with my skin and if I would keep it up. Just to set the record straight I do wash my face (!) but as I don't often wear make-up and have sensitive skin I don't use a 'soap' or make-up remover. One week down so far so good. I might need to go back and buy a bigger size of the cleanser and try to keep it up.

:: The girls played together nicely and I ‘enjoyed’ a bit of early morning ironing with ‘Would I lie to you’ on iplayer.

:: A friend from work who I became close to when pregnant with our first children left for a new job. It’s a great move for her and her career. She’s moving to the dark side of the Pennines and taking up residence in Liverpool. I’m really going to miss her. BigR had a little cry when she knew her friend was leaving but the joke is we’ll probably see more of them now than when they lived round the corner!

:: I’ve made (some) progress on a scarf for the ABO. As we’ve had such a mild winter so far he’s not needed it which is a good thing as I doubt if it’ll be ready until 2017!

:: I found an old Cath Kidston voucher with £7 left on it and bought a new ‘fold-away’ bag to keep in my work bag for when I need another bag.

:: I discovered the crack cocaine of the biscuit world. Thankfully I only work 3 days a week and left them there…until today…

:: I took LittleR’s old clothes to work for 2 friends who have girls who are a year younger than Littlest. Some of the ‘frocks’ were barely worn. It’s good to see them going to their new homes!

:: I (finally) plucked up the courage to speak to my boss about my work (specifically one area of it) and if we could make any changes. I've not been happy with one aspect for a while. I'm a bit of a round peg in a square hole and although everyone is lovely, I'm not really achieving much or feeling like I'm doing a good job. For those not in the know, usually academics are ‘rated’ on their ability to be returned in the Research Excellence Framework. Basically this is how Universities are given their research funding – the quality of the outputs (research articles, grants, indicators of esteem (no I’m not sure either)) is judged and money given in return. Now on the horizon is the Teaching excellence framework due to be judged in a similar (metric) way and ultimately I believe will change how fees can be charged. I was returned with my department last time in the REF but due to changes within departments, the wider University and education more generally our department is unlikely to be returned which puts research academics into difficulty. You might want to be returned and work towards this goal but then the department isn’t returned as a whole (the story has to 'fit') so where does that leave you (and ultimately your job!)? There’s an option to change contracts to be more teaching focussed but in a Russell group University teaching is (still) sadly seen as the poor relation to research. So now I’m not sure where my role stands or what I want to do. I love the teaching part of my job but it’s a bit of a conundrum.  

:: I’ve made copious scones. Sometimes Paul Hollywood’s sometimes Mary Berry’s. I found a jar of my strawberry jam (as opposed to Bonne Maman) in the cupboard and we’ve all been enjoying them with butter and a dollop of that. Now to get some clotted cream…

:: I’ve been in the mood to clear stuff out (see above with children’s clothes). I did a bit of a KonMari style tidying and thought to see which of my clothes ‘sparked joy’. I’d seen her book a few times and the idea looked interesting. It was a bit of a weird undertaking for a Brit to see what I found joyful but I got rid quite a bit of ‘stuff’ including 3 pairs of coloured jeans which I used to like but now don’t. I have my ‘at home’ uniform of white t shirt, jeans/denim skirt, cardi (various colours), scarf. I keep getting ideas of stripes or spots or something but that might be too much pattern with scarf and cardi. Hmm. More food for thought.

:: We went to the seaside, to Whitby. We walked on the beach even though the tide was coming in and had a treat of fish and chips in the Magpie Cafe then an ice cream on the pier (yes in January). It was such a lovely day with minimal moaning and arguing from the back seat of the car!

:: I’ve been making lists (many of them during meetings which I'm obliged to attend but can't make a meaningful contribution to). Lots of lists. Lots of notebooks. One of the best ways I cope with making decisions (see above for job thoughts) is making a list. Although when it came to the job options I did add 'give it all up' (which is not really an option – financially or intellectually and is little bit defeatist!) 

:: I've been revisiting the (now very long) list of things I want to make. First seen here. I've still not done the applique blanket(s - now the littlest will want her own too) or the skirts (although I have the fabric and it's nearly spring!) or the  photobooks. And I've added some extra things to it. First up is to finish the scarf (see above) and then I need to complete an embroidery for my friend's daughter. It was going to be a new baby present but then LittleR became ill and it got left by the wayside. Anyway it can be a first birthday present. Due for the end of February I think it's achievable and I'll share it here when it's done along with an updated long list.

Thanks to everyone for their comments recently. I know I'm terribly behind again on emailing you and commenting on your blogs. I'll get there eventually.  

That difficult bit in the middle

I keep thinking I should blog. I have a list of bloggable things. Then an inertia overtakes me and I don’t. I’ve been reading blogs but I haven’t been commenting as much as I would like either (again)….meaning I will catch up with it but I’m fighting a losing battle on what seems like all fronts at the moment. It’s a busy time at the moment work is busy (this is a good thing, I really don’t like being idle) and of course there’s life stuff to keep up with.

LittlestR has relapsed so it’s been a bit of a fraught time. We’re back on track again (I hope), for now, but I can’t help thinking (and knowing) this is only the beginning. This is not helpful to the getting yourself out of the inertia. But enough of this navel gazing tedium. I’m boring myself with my woe is me excuses…

So of course it’s not all doom and gloom. There have been plenty of bright moments over the last 40 odd days…here of just some of them.

Day 38 – We took advantage of the enforced INSET day at the start of half term and went to Yorkshire Wildlife Park. It’s a great day out and ticks all our boxes. It’s not a too arduous journey, there’s plenty to see (and lots of new things too), plenty of places to have a picnic, you’re outside walking round so getting some fresh air and there’s an ice cream stop. Since we last visited they’ve taken in some more polar bears.

Day 42 – Half term passed in a blur really. I took a day off work and spent it day with BigR. As a surprise I booked into our local pottery painting café. We had great fun working on our items. BigR painted a plate (she drew some dolphins) and I painted a pen pot and then we both did a Christmas decoration. (They’re now adorning the tree…more on that later….) In my mind's eye there would be seed pods on a mottled background. Next time I';ll sue a finer brush. The pot now sits atop our microwave. 

Day 45 – Madly I let BigR choose a little gift in The Works. She chose a fairy door….and so her fairy, Verbena, was born. Verbena visited every day for 4 days until she ran out of fairy dust (read I just couldn’t think of anything else to say in response to the weight of pictures and offerings left at the door). She’s due to make a comeback soon.

Day 46- I couldn't leave these strawberries in the shop. They were destined to become more jam. And as Sarah pointed out on Instagram Lancashire grown to Yorkshire made.

Day 53 – The weather was so poor we stayed at home and watched a new film…The Jungle Book. We had popcorn. It was great fun.

Day 59 – BigR once again showed her creative side and made a Hama Bead Pudsey Bear. I failed a little on my part by sticking the ironing paper to the creation. Iron too hot? Not concentrating? Still I redeemed myself with a sponge cake.

I also admired my mittens that my very talented friend Sarah made me. They combined well with the floor of the Leeds General Infirmary. 

Day 62 – Enthused by watching Rick Stein eating moussaka I made us one (to be eaten the next day). I started it at 7pm one night when the girls had gone to bed. Around 8pm I wondered why I thought it was a good idea as there were pots and trays everywhere and my béchamel wasn’t thickening. When I’d finished though and I’d cleared up I was really pleased. There’s something I love about pottering around in the kitchen making something to have for another day and being that organised! I’ve spent a lot of time slumped in front of the TV lately, a bit too tired to be bothered doing anything, so this really helped with that inertia fug. Plus when we ate it, it was delicious.

Day 63 – Finally I made the arms for the knitted dolls I’m (still) making. Eventually they’ll be two dolls. Eventually.

I really rather liked how the French flags reflected in my wine and almost matched my knitting.

Day 70 – Sometimes I really love my job. Today was one of those days. I was assessing a session where the students were teaching. I’ve learned so many things from these sessions over the years. Today I learnt (amongst other things) how to make an origami tulip. Brilliant.

Day 74 – The weather was atrocious and the ABO is working the next few weekends so we both ventured into the loft to get the Christmas decorations out. The tree is now up…(perhaps a little early for some) and adorned in a way only a 6 year old and almost 3 year old want to decorate! I added the decorations we made at the pottery painting place and am working on moving some of the baubles around…so we have  them a bit more evenly distributed.

Day 75 - I'd seen the recipe for these Red Velvet Snowflakes in a magazine and in my carefully planned world I'd prepared and chilled the dough. I was a little skeptical about how this would go as the dough was supremely sticky. Anyway, in my head this was going to be a joyous, child friendly baking activity. Cut to an hour later where I'd used another 50-100g of flour so I could roll the dough out and  spent the majority of that time trying to stop two small children fighting or burning themselves whilst covered in flour - we were finally were ready to cut the cookies. Things I have learnt, only cook with one child at a time. Never expect it is easy to roll anything out between two sheets of baking paper. Red Velvet snowflakes are fine as stocking, snowmen and tress and stars. Anyway they taste nice even if I couldn't be bothered to ice them after all that shenanigans!

So with a background of illness combined with busyness we’ve had some really good moments. I’m planning to visit and comment on everyone’s blogs this week. I hope you’ll bear with me.

La Rentree

Did you know that the French (and the Italians) have a word for this time of year? La Rentree (il rientro) is the autumnal time for going back to school. In these countries it's more than just the return to school. Often it's the return to work after the extended summer holiday (that they still seem to have for 2 weeks in August in Italy where every man woman and child seems to go on holiday and everything closes!).

I think it's a good word to describe this time of year. BigR returned to school on Monday (with labelled uniform!) and we start to settle into that autumn routine. It's a time for birthdays and for plans. And for stationery of course. It's a time when I feel relentlessly positive, a fresh start, a new moment. even the darkening evenings don't squash my perky mood

I'm more than ready for Autumn. We had a really good summer but this Autumn feels like a new year. LittleR is much better and things can continue in more of an even keel. 

I've been making plans:

• things to do (places to go - I want to see the poppy exhibition at the Yorkshire Sculpture Park)
• things I'd like to do in the house (including sorting through the epic number of toys and actually getting some out of the house, probably under the cloak of darkness), 
• things I'd like to make (food and crafty stuff)
• things which need to be done (replace a window - ugh!)

So my newest plan is to make a shawl for myself and knitted dolls for the girls from a most excellent book by Jane Bull. 

I've bought the wool for all the projects....and am itching to get going. 

However...

I've already gotten in a knot with the biggest Titus skein. I'm also totally confused by the pattern. Turn the work 90 degrees clockwise and knit into itself? Might as well be in gibberish! Ah well I'll get there eventually. It's a good job Autumn and Winter last a long time!

I am trying

Yes I know I am trying in all senses of the word.

:: I am trying to Get. Stuff. Done. I’ve written and rewritten my do list today and I am getting through it. I just had to put a couple of items on the list that I’d already completed just to give me more impetus.

:: I am trying to be patient when hearing my child read. Give me my due, for the most part I am. Unless she’s making no effort and then I feel really annoyed. She doesn’t know this yet. I guess you have to get her at the ‘right’ moment. And me at the right moment too.

:: I am trying not to be too disappointed it’s raining. Again.

:: I am trying to get bulbs into the garden in the few moments that LittleR is asleep. She loves to be outside but has to constantly monitored leaving no room for bulb digging.

:: I am trying to look forward to a few days off.

:: I am trying to believe that these all won’t be 5.30am get up times.

:: I am trying not to wish my children’s lives away but really do hope they start getting up after 6am! That seems far more civilised.

:: I am trying to be more prepared for that thing that happens as the same time every year in December. 

:: I am trying to hold off on buying a new notebook to prepare for that thing that happens in December.

:: I am trying to think of some more personal gifts for friends. I’ve had an idea of embroidered decorations…we’ll see…watch this space.

:: I am trying not to be too cross with a school that gives 2 days’ notice for a costume on the theme of ‘a hero’.  Yes, she does want to go dressed as Elsa.

:: I am trying to read a very dull academic paper and failing.

:: I am trying to look for solutions to the CD/DVD explosion we have in the corner of our living room. I’m thinking of recycling the cases and using an big CD/DVD envelope. We hardly play CDs now as they’re all on the computer. That means more space for cookery books!

:: I am trying to remember that in amongst all the trivial things, I am trying and that’s something.

(Don't you think the pink primrose at the back looks like she's waving and shouting 'I'm over here!')

I am. I try to be. I am not.

I am

• Cold – all of a sudden it’s Autumn and Autumn with a vengeance. The sandals are gone. I need to get some new socks and dig out my boots.
• Enjoying days out – We went to the zoo at the weekend. LittleR was so, so, so excited to see a real elephant!
• Going on another cookery course next week. I've not really challenged myself with technique but chosen things we might like to eat again in the future. I’m still using the goulash recipe I learnt a while ago very regularly.
• Making lists. Of things I need to do at work. Of things I need to remember to do at home. Of things to make. Of ideas for things for the blog. Of books to read and books I've read. Of stuff to cook. Suddenly realising there’s a name for all the info keeping – a commonplace book.
• Reading lots. I've found my mojo again I think. And I've lots of new book ideas from Laura and the year in books.
• In awe that people can actually read. BigR is doing phonics at school. She’s blazing a trail in phonics and I’m struggling to keep up – letter sounds, blending, and the songs…I keep using the wrong tune with the rhyme!! Learning to read is really hard – especially for the parents!!

I try to be

• Patient. In all aspects of my life but especially with small children.  I’m finding it hard to moderate my voice and not let the frustration show. I know I’m not the only one attempting  to get shoes/uniform on, hair sorted toys off the middle of the stairs all in the 2 minutes before we leave the house. I have to remind myself that BigR is only five. And might need to be told more than once with extreme patience.
• On top of things and I think I’m getting there. Term started, my admin support went off sick and my Mum had surgery. I was super busy at work and then really tired. The kind of tired that creeps up on you and you fall asleep with the light on and wake up at 1am and have to get up out of bed to turn stuff off. I've been absent from here and from commenting and I've missed it. Here's to normal (whatever that is) service being resumed shortly..
•  Happy to be sat outside in the rain at a children’s party. Still it was better when the other children went home and I got a go. Thank goodness I’d been prescriptive about pelvic floor exercises!!

I am not

• Going to tire of old rom coms. I love You've Got Mail. It’s very good ironing fodder. And full of great (and coffee related) quotes “The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee. Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat, etc. So people who don't know what the hell they're doing or who on earth they are can, for only $2.95, get not just a cup of coffee but an absolutely defining sense of self: Tall. Decaf. Cappuccino.”
• Able to remember how to join the initial circle in a granny square and then start the next row. I'll have to youtube it.
• Able to stop buying new mugs. This one is particularly comfy in the hand.

• Going to finish Christina’s sock pattern (I'm on January!) before the end of the year. I’m just not going quickly enough.

I saw this great post from Jennifer and then this good one from Leanne and felt it was a good way to ease back in.

September

I love this time of year. The smell of freshly sharpened pencils (yes that was a “You’ve Got Mail” quote). I really get the New Year feeling, must be the academic in me never letting go of the start of the school term! It’s been a part of my life for 36 years! And now...it’s going to be part of BigR’s life. Today is BigR’s last day at nursery and tomorrow afternoon she goes to school for the first time. By rights I should be at work but I’m at home as LittleR was unwell yesterday. Still the illness only last 8 hours and she was wolfing down food yesterday afternoon. Back to normal (but obeying the 48 hours illness rule).

Big R is ready for school. More than ready. She’s 5 in less than a week but...all of a sudden I am not. I think I’m mourning the loss of our flexibility more than anything. Wondering if she'll be OK (I know she will). Still I guess it’s a big change for us all. And she can’t wait to be able to read herself. So today I had a moment of what it’ll be like when the ABO is on earlies and BigR is at school. I spent the morning with LittleR and we did ‘jobs’. She’s good company! Loves pointing out babies – ‘Baby! Shhhh’ and anything emblazoned with ‘Minnie’, ‘Kitty’ or ‘Peppa’.

We went to Ikea to get a few organising bits and a chair for LittleR to (hopefully) stop the squabbling over who gets to sit on the chair. I love this time of year to clear stuff out and get stuff done. So with that in mind, I treated myself to a new notebook and some paper tapes there too (it would’ve been rude not to) but managed not to overdo it too much! We had a coffee (me) and some cucumber snacks and animal biscuits (LittleR, oh OK and me) Then, we stopped off to get some new bedding for BigR’s big girl bed.

Now LittleR is napping and when I’ve finished this I’m going to do some of the necessary domestic jobs (clear away lunch, hang out the washing, tidy up the toys again)...and arrange my dishwasher tablets into their new container. That really pleases me.

Reading lists

I have a confession. I love books. Any sort at all. And bookshops. And libraries. As a child I was a voracious reader. There were weekly trips to the local library and to the library where my grandparents lived. One of my favourite games was playing libraries, making the tickets to go in the books (none of this computerised stuff back then!!), organising the book shelves and fining people when they were late with their books.

In recent years I’ve been more ruthless donated lots of my books to the charity shop or friends. Novels I read once and didn’t enjoy,books that I don’t need anymore (7000 baby names) and things that I just won’t look at again. These have been replaced with numerous cookery and craft books, replacing the fictional world with factual things.

When bigR was born something amazing happened. I stopped reading. Gone was the 2 books a week rapacious reader and in its place? Nothing. I don’t even know what I did with the time (apart from looking after a baby but you know what I mean). After a year, I started reading again, slowly, maybe a book every other month if I was lucky. 

Then, suddenly, there was a change and I can only attribute it to one thing. I received a kindle as a birthday gift. Now I never thought I would like an e-reader. I like the feel of the novel in your hand, the smell of the pages, searching out the book in a book shop but the kindle has been a revelation to me. I can have a huge number of books with me at any time and since Christmas when I received a kindle with an inbuilt light I can read in the dark – (that would’ve been amazing during night feeds!!)  My only bugbear is that you can only get books via amazon but there are plenty of self-publishing authors that way so maybe it balances out?

Initially, via Leanne, and then Christina and Sarah, I found the reading link up at Circle of Pines.

So this month I’m going against my usual trait and becoming a joiner. I’ll be reading The Rosie Project - Graeme Simsion and The Goldfinch - Donna Tartt. (When I’ve worked out how to add myself to the links I will!!) I’m looking forward to finding lots of new books to enjoy.